I Have No Words

Dear God-

I pray that you will give me strength today. I pray that you will help me listen more than I speak. I pray that you will give me peace about the things I do not understand; the things I cannot explain.

My heart is heavy today. So much pain. So much anger. So much hurt. I heart because the man I love is broken. I hurt because I know that you are the only one who can help his pain go away.

I pray for Brian today. I do not understand why his life was short. and why mine continues.

I pray for those things that I do not understand. Why do good people die and bad people live? Why do children starve to death? Or grow up orphaned? Why is there evil and why do some despise good?

So many thoughts are swimming through my head. My stomach hurts. My heart aches. My eyes have run dry. I cannot cry anymore. I cannot scream. I struggle with wishing for the opposite of what is - knowing that your plan is perfect.

Today, I am broken.
Everything happens for a reason. I hope that someday that reason will be revealed.

I love you.
Caroline